What’s For Lunch? My Treat.

[Written for the workplace, but useful for everyone.]

The only thing that can make a delicious meal taste even better is eating it in good company. Though I am totally fine eating some version of yumminess alone, I would much rather do so with someone. Anyone really. I mean, I love people! That’s why I do what I do – help others invest more deeply into relationships! But we’re not talking about me here. We’re talking about you and your wonderful coworkers.

Ok. I get it. I wasn’t born yesterday. I know you can probably think of some coworkers that aren’t so wonderful, but let’s be optimistic here. Though there may be someone just a cubicle away that makes you think twice about coming to work, I am hoping that a little INgagement will improve the quality of your workplace relationships. All I ask is that you give it a try.

Now, our lunch breaks are due to come at some point or another, so how can we make the most of it? Hmmm. You’ve got it! Yes! On the way home today, let’s head to the market to pick the best ingredients to make the most special meal for them tomorrow! Ha! Though I am totally kidding, you may end up bonding so well that you actually do that someday – making their favorite meal. But, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. This will be our first attempt, so we don’t have to do anything too over-the-top.

Based on Step 1 & 2, we’ve already picked up on some clues from previous observation (read What The Ears and Eyes Capture and Making The Ask Easier). So suggesting one of their favorite local restaurants should be a breeze. But, if they always bring their lunch from home, what type of cuisine is brought most frequently? Choose that type of restaurant, then you are much closer to INgaging over lunch. Finally, if you are not a fan of eating out, I guess the break room or outdoor eating area will suffice.

Alright. Now that we have figured out what we will eat and where we will eat it, it is time to determine when. If your schedules always line up perfectly, there’s not much to figure out. But if your schedules differ, take a look at them to determine the soonest possible date for the lunch. Alright. Now we’ve got – date, time, what, and where. Now let’s make the ask!

The ask takes place a day or days beforehand. This is unless you already know that asking the day of would prove successful. If not, ask the person of they would like to go to this restaurant for lunch on that day. Maybe it can sound something like this, “Hey ________. What do you think about going to __________ for lunch Thursday?” Be ready to answer follow-up questions. They may ask why you suddenly want to have lunch with them. So, as I usually say…be honest. Maybe your response is that they always bring that delicious-smelling food from there and you want to give it a try. Or, maybe you share that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know them better. Just be yourself. If nothing you say works, say, “My treat.” But only if you mean it.

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While together, simply converse as if you met for the first time. If you have discovered similar interests during Steps 1 & 2, maybe you can use those to get the ball rolling? Most importantly though, be INgaged. Pay attention to everything. This lunch is an adventure of discovery, as all of your INteractions will be. After lunch ends, take a few moments to store your findings somewhere. Write down what you have learned, so you can better invest into the relationship. 

That’s all there is to Step 3. Why are we doing this? Why not? If we are going to spend several hours a day with people, we might as well make the most of it. You will probably meet some pretty cool people.

Until next time…